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Avoiding the Trap of Unrealistic Expectations for Your New Dog
by: Christie Miller Austin Dog Examiner, Texas
After reading my last article, a friend of mine working in the rescue world asked that I address another issue she feels important to anyone considering adopting a new dog, what I would call unrealistic expectations of what it means to own a dog. Specifically, she asked me to address this in terms of adult dogs in shelters and rescues.
What do I mean by unrealistic expectations? Simply put, I believe that when adopting a dog most people do not take into account the variances in behavior between a dog at a shelter and a dog in a home environment, between a dog in a home that it has grown familiar and accustomed to and a dog in a new and foreign environment, and of course the behaviors that may have been previously instilled in a dog that may need to be modified. I’ve seen people time and time again return a dog to a shelter because “it just didn’t work out” whether it be because the dog is jumping, chewing, destructive, guarding, “aggressive”, hyper, etc. The reason to me doesn’t matter. What does matter is the unrealistic expectation that a dog should come into your home from what is sometimes a very stressful environment and require little to no work and no adjustment period to become the perfect family member you were looking for.
I’ve had several people write me and argue the point that most people adopt puppies because they do not come with “baggage” per se. And, although I do agree that they are less likely to come with undesirable characteristics that have been instilled by previous owners or experiences due to their relatively short life span, it does not mean that they do not come without behavioral issues needing modification. Case in point: my Labrador retriever. I adopted her as a puppy from Town Lake Animal Shelter when she was only 8-10 weeks old. However, even at her young age she came with a serious case of separation anxiety. It took me quite a long time to work through that issue with her, partially because of bad training advice at the time, but it was an issue needing dealt with nonetheless.
What to expect from your new dog:
BEHAVIOR: You should expect your dog to exhibit any of an array of behaviors when being brought into your new home. There is no way for me to properly predict what will happen between any one dog and one person once a dog is brought home for the first time without intrinsically knowing the person. Stop there. Reread that last statement. I said intrinsically knowing the person, not the dog. This may be confusing to many people out there, but it was a huge revelation in my life as well as many others’ and it can be summed up by the simple statement, “Dogs reflect their owners completely.” That is not to say that a dog will not try things or test you, but it is you as a master that will mold and shape your dog. It is the reaction you have to behaviors from the beginning and on a consistent basis that will determine what kind of dog you will have: they joy you were looking for or the terror you wished you’d never laid eyes on. Dogs require leadership and direction and without this you will never have a dog that was the dog it was meant to be.
UNDERSTAND THE BREED: Do not pick a dog just based on looks. Really dig deep to find out why it is you are looking for a dog and what environment your dog will be in. Do you want a dog to compete with and work on a regular basis? Do you want more of a couch potato kind of dog that you just want to be a well behaved companion to lay around your apartment? Or do you want somewhere in the middle so you can push your dog at times but you know it won’t go nuts if it’s not constantly challenged? There are breeds that fit into all of these categories. Now granted, sometimes the breeds listed for a dog at a shelter are just the best guesses available, but it should still give you some clue along with the shelter’s behavior analysis if the dog will suit your purpose. Picking a dog solely based on looks will more than likely leave you disappointed and may land the dog back in the shelter.
What your dog should expect from you:
TRAINING: I do not care who you are, how much money or time you have, or how much you know about dogs, you should NEVER consider owning a dog without realizing the investment you have to make of yourself when it comes to training. EVERY dog needs training. Plain and simple. If for no other reason than to help build your bond with your new dog, every dog you own should be involved in some sort of training. I’m not saying you need to spend thousands of dollars or that if you are capable of training your own dog you should have to seek out a professional. What I am saying is that there is a major time investment and commitment you are making when you bring a dog home. If you are not willing to invest at least your time in some sort of structured training with your dog and not just in play time or exercise, do not get a dog for the dog’s sake. The training doesn’t have to last forever, but it does need to happen. Without it I can almost certainly guarantee you that your dog will end up being more of a frustration than a joy. And if you are just going to end up putting the dog in the back yard to be ignored anyway, why even bring him home?
UNDERSTANDING: Dogs are dogs. They are not people. They must be treated like dogs in order to be happy, healthy, and stable. I am not saying that you need a PhD in dog behavior or psychology. In fact, I think the people that understand dogs the best are the farthest from a PhD you will ever see. What I am saying is that you need to realize when you bring a dog home that it will exhibit dog behaviors. A dog will also test you. You need to understand that. You need to be ready for it, and you need to properly modify the behavior to either encourage it or extinguish it based on what you want from your dog. If you do not know how to properly do this on your own, find someone who does. There are a few simple principles that will make a world of difference in strengthening your bond but it is up to you to understand your dog and apply them.
FAIRNESS: You must realize that a dog is coming from an environment that creates instability when you bring it home, and there will be an adjustment period. I require all of my training students to have had their dogs in their home for a minimum of two weeks before ever enrolling them in an obedience class to insure that the dog has had at least a small adjustment period and at least a little time to begin bonding with their new owner. The actual adjustment period can be as little as a day or as long as several months depending on the dog, it’s history, and the conditions it has come from. So be fair to the dog in this. It is learning. But do not coddle or feel sorry for the dog. The past is in the past. Just move forward from here and realize that there may be a few small disappointments along the way to major milestones.
So, in summary, decide what you need from your dog and what lengths, both monetarily and mentally, you are willing to go through to in order to get the dog you want before setting out on your search. Then, once you find the dog, realize that a bond is something that takes time and work, patience and consistency, fairness and understanding. If you keep this in mind and seek out help when needed, you will never see your dog returned to a shelter.
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