Dog Jokes: 10 Commandments for Dogs

Dear Dog, here are 10 rules I would like you to live by:

1. You shall sniff no other animals or humans other than your own kind.
2. You shall not use the sofa as a “face towel” or shake the rainwater out of your fur inside the house instead of outside.
3. You shall not suddenly stand straight up when under the coffee table or the Christmas tree.
4. Remember the House rules, and keep it holy. Do not sit in the middle of the living room and clean yourself.
5. Honor your father and your mother even if they will not let you on the couch.
6. You shall not murder by using the cat as a squeaky toy.
7. You shall not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc. just because you like the way they smell.
8. You shall not steal “cookies” out of the litter box.
9. You shall not bear false witness against the garbage collector, he is not stealing your stuff.
10. You shall not covet the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.